The skinny on a bare bear.

There was a bear, and this bear, he had no hair. He swore, "I will get to the bottom of this, no matter how deep it goes!"

So he asked the parrot, but the parrot wouldn't talk. It was acting flighty, besides.
He ate the parrot.

He asked the earthworm, but it had no dirt. He ate it, and was left with a bad taste in his mouth.

He asked the giraffe, since it sticks its neck into everything - but it held its head high. The bear ate it, too, but was only hungry enough to shorten the legs.
"That'll bring him down to earth," said the bear.

He asked the elephant, since it sticks its nose into all sorts of thing, and has great ears besides. But things did not go well. Elephants are very sensitive to questions about hair.
The bear left before anything went down.

He asked the bee, since it's a busybody, but all its buzz was maddeningly inane. Bees are bad to eat. He did eat its house and honey, though.

The lurking spiders hadn't seen anything, nor caught anything in their secret webs; the birds wouldn't sing, the rats didn't squeak, and the owls only asked, "who?"

After all this grilling, the bear was now full - both of food and questions. He was also full of disappointment, and sighs.
So, when he met a pack of punk dogs, he did not ask for answers.
These punk dogs had perhaps once been hot, but they'd shaved off their hair. Now they were unleashed - they always did just as they pleased. The huge hairless bear was a big hit; before long he found himself with piercings and tattoos covering his bare skin, just like the pack he ran with. He felt happy, and free.

Then winter came. And it was cold - its' bite was especially bad through the new metal barbs in his skin.
The dogs said they would go to their homes; they would return to their masters, whom would not welcome a bear. But the bear was still bald, and could not sleep soundly through the long winter's night. Angry, he asked the dogs:
"What do you know of my barrenness?"
"Nothing till now. Ask the doctor, not us."
And he growled.
"Oh! Then, you're a baron, looking for his wife?"
He grumbled.
"No? Why worry? You, being barren, will match the empty land of ice - and like cannot hurt like; you will not freeze."
"I want my hair."

They barked with laughter, and told him he would be a traitor to rebellion if he should want such a thing. He thought of those dogs, hot by the fire, and decided he'd rather it be him full of hot dogs, than those homes.
Their piercings got stuck in his teeth, and he wandered the snowy cold, miserable, in need of floss, and alone (but for a pack of done hot dogs).


It was late and dark when a light dawned on him, and there, stood his fairy bearmother. "What is the matter, you naked mess? Were you born just now, fat, naked, full-grown, and alone?"
He was cold, and hungry, and his spirits were low, not like this flying one, and so he grumbled that he was bare, and that his bare back would be much better if he could get his bear hair back.
She growled, "your answer's as obvious as your birthday suit, and would suitably conceal that, too. Or is your head as empty as your coat?"
But he was a bear, and not terribly clever. Instantly he thought of eating her, and she said "I've been watching you, though not for the view. Think it again - you'll lose your skin, too." Fairy bears are big and hairy, flying, and very scary.
So he left.

He wandered the wintry wastes. He asked the wind for answers, but it only whispered. The wolves howled, the trees sighed, fishing was fruitless, and even the rivers froze up. No answers came.

Lumbering along, he again found the giraffe, though now, as it lay on the ground, they could see eye-to-eye. "Arrogant animal, see how I've grounded you!" laughed the bear, darkly, at his own cut-down. "But we two are too alike now - cold, but only you from the icy grip that even spring won't thaw; yet." Then he saw it would no longer need its coat, said,
"We shall come close for warmth," and took it for his own.

His investigations over, the bear was glad to find some sort of cover-up. "Finally! A solution to that hairy problem!" the bear exclaimed.
"Better yet, I didn't have to beg or borrow, and there's no ugly, bothersome to-pay!"
And somewhere, the fairy bearmother laughed.
Who knew a cover-up could be so heartwarming?