A Strange Meeting

It is a cavernous, dingy room, the edges of which recede into shadow. Perhaps it is a warehouse. It is muffled and quiet inside, like the inside of a closet full of coats.

Enter Two Strange Gentlemen, from opposite sides

Thin gentleman: "Hey! It's been a while.'"

Gentleman in white: "Oh, it's only been a few years. And, we've known each other for so long - it's like we never parted ways."

Thin gentleman: "So true. So what have you been up to?"

Gentleman in white: "Oh, well, you know. The usual, of course. I've got a few projects in the works. They're pretty exciting, really. Never seen anything like it, I guarantee you."

Thin gentleman: *laughs* "Is that right? And here I thought you'd been in a rut lately. I never hear about you anymore - at least, not like the old days. Don't tell me it has to do with the birds?"

Gentleman in white: "A real showman never tells - he shows. And it's not ready yet."

Thin gentleman: "Huh. So what're the dates looking like?"

Gentleman in white: "Well, I can't say."

Thin gentleman: "Well, I already know anyway. It seems like it has good potential - but I wonder if you can really execute - like in the old days. Remember how it was the other year? With that thing - SARS, was it? What happened there?"

Gentleman in white: "Come on. Everyone has their rough spots."

Thin gentleman: "Then you should invest in sandpaper."

Gentleman in white: *quickly* "How about you? What've you been up to? Still sticking to your little patch of home turf?"

Thin gentleman: "You know very well I have international operations. True, I've mostly been in Africa lately. But - life's just so easy there, you know? I hardly have to put any effort into anything. I have people to do it all for me, there. You really ought to give that a try sometime."

Gentleman in white: "I did. It wasn't nearly as rewarding as you promised."

Thin gentleman: "I can't help it if your help is helpless."

Gentleman in white: "They were not helpless! They did excellent work developing new products! Delivery methods, too - they just never delivered. You know that as well as I do."

Thin gentleman: "Like I'd bother to know every detail of your work. I've got important things of my own to do."

Gentleman in white: "Don't give me that. You're always hanging on my coattails. You always try to steal my glory!"

Thin gentleman: "Now you're one to talk."



*something crashes in the distance*



Gentleman in white: "I wonder if that's..."

Thin gentleman: "Of course. Who else would make such a racket?"



*A huge, burly figure marches up to the group*



Big man: *roaring with laughter* "Fighting like an old couple! You two never change!"

Thin gentleman: "Nor do you."

Gentleman in white: "What'd you break this time?"

Big man: *laughs again* "I have no idea! It doesn't matter, anyway. So how've you two been?"

Thin gent: "Oh, we were just talking about that. We've both got some things in the works, you know. Always busy. How about you?"

Big man: "I may be loud, but I heard you fighting. Riding each others' coattails, and all that. Hah! The pot calls the kettle black!"

Both gents: "Is that so."

Big man: "Sure thing. My coat's never fit quite right what with you two weighing it down." *laughs* "Well, I guess our thin friend doesn't weigh all that much. And I suppose you've got to get around somehow. You ticks, you!"

Gent in white: "Arrogant as ever, I see. Well, even ticks can bring a man down. One bite, that's all. Just one bite from one of those diseased little buggers. That's all it takes."

Big man: *laughs* "And what, exactly, has ever stopped me?"



*the two gents scowl*



Thin gent: "We don't stop, either. If we're ticks, then so long as you keep going - we do, too. Maybe a tick could even suck its host dry."

Big man: "You two always were funny. If you'd spend more time working - just imagine what you could do! Leave the fighting to me. That's my raison d'etre, you know."

Gent in white: "Sure, you get a lot done. But - you have no artistic vision! No class! No cares! Try working our way for once."

Big man: "Eh, I've done that. Lot of extra effort for nothing. I mean, really, who appreciates my work, anyway? Not you two. Nobody else, either. I just do things my way. Good enough for me."

Thin gent: "No one appreciates your work because it's just not that original. What is your vision? It seems to be the same as ours."



*a pale man suddenly leaks from the shadows, like an inkstain spreading on paper. His face is set to a perpetual grin*



Pale man: "Same as mine."




*the big man stiffens with respect, the other two simply stare*

*Silence*



Pale man: *smiling?* "Hmm. I killed the party, it seems."

Big man: *laughs awkwardly* "Oh, not yet. Not yet. We were just talking about work."

Pale man: "Yes, work. Ah, it never ends. But such a joy."

Gent in white: "We, uh, we didn't know if you would be here."

Pale man: "I'm always here."

Thin gent: "But I've seen you everywhere!"

Pale man: "I do get around, don't I?"

Gent in white: "That's...that's confusing."

Pale man: "Are we strangers?"

Gent in white: "What?"

Pale man: "I haven't changed. So - tell me what you're doing."

All three start talking: "Well, I -"

Pale man: "No, I'll see soon enough. Surprise me. I really must be going. I've work to do yet."



*fades back into the blackness*



Thin gent: "That guy is so damn creepy. Who made him boss?"

Gent in white: "We did. Remember? We can't get anything done without him. Not any of us. But, yeah. I never can tell what he's thinking."

Big man: "He's a good guy, I think. He's always treated me with respect."

Gent in white: "Me too - but, I've never seen him angry. Or even happy. I've only ever seen that unsettling smile. Like he's just gonna keep smiling until judgment day, come Hell and high water. Nothing ever bothers him. He never struggles. And he never stops. He makes us look...lazy."

Thin gent: "And we rely on him so much..."

Gent in white: "I always wondered where he came from. Do either of you know?"

Big man: *quick laugh* "He's as old as the hills. Ask them."

Gent in white: "I have a feeling I could disinter the hills and valleys both of all their secrets - and still find no answers."

Big man: "Probably not. Well, you've got to respect the guy."

Gent in white: "I suppose."

Big man: "Anyway, didn't you two have some important projects to attend to? My business is calling to me. I'll be seeing you."



*exits*



Thin gent: "I hate relying on those guys."

Gent in white: "Well, we can take some satisfaction from the fact that our big friend is just as reliant on the boss as we are."

Thin gent: "That doesn't change anything for us, though."

Gent in white: "I suppose not. Well, I'd better let you get back to your life of...well, whatever you've been doing recently."

Thin gent: "Same to you. Shall we meet again soon?"

Gent in white: "Of course. Maybe what we need to break out of our collective ruts is a little collaboration. What do you say?"

Thin gent: "Soon, but not yet. I'd like to try a few things out first - just a few little projects, a little housecleaning. Let's get that out of the way first, shall we? Then we can do something major."

Gent in white: "Fair enough. I'll see you soon, then."

Thin gent: "Adios, man."

Gent in white: *chuckles* "Yeah, Adios to you, too."

*exeunt*